West Witch

Quoth Dryunya:

I… think that’s not exactly a scientific approach, lady Witch.
I understood your last post as an attempt to analyze the interdimensional travels and… I don’t know, apply your magic to repeat them? But I don’t think just trying out fictional means of transportation is going to work. They are called ‘fictional’ for a reason.

Well alright then. You wanted science? I give you science.

As you have all become horribly aware, I am not at my magical best in this world. I blame it on the lack of a proper grimmoire, but I suppose it is also possible that your world is not suited for magic. Therefore, I have decided to turn my brief attentions to the magic-equivalent of your world.

I’ve been studying the ideas of wormholes these past few days, poring into books that were not easy to find at all (why don’t you people find this stuff more interesting to read?) I finally caught onto how the math and science works compared to the magic of my world. The math to create a Morris-Thorne wormhole wasn’t too complex; what took more time was figuring out how to apply the mathematics to physics and science. The lack of incantations to use threw me off until I realized that they apply in the same way to computer commands with machinery to control the process.

The main issue I had after studying the subject was creating the exotic matter necessary to sustain a stable wormhole (there are other ways of doing this, but the easiest seems to use exotic matter). There are only a few places that have formed stable exotic matter, but its extremely dangerous unless you can narrow down the mathematics to the googleplexth. I’ll admit, I stole some items and broke into a few high tech laboratories, but it truly was in the name of science. At the end of all of this, I only had a few tries before I ran out of material and the machinery began to fail.

Needless to say, I did succeed in forming a few small wormholes. However, as much as I tried to manipulate the wormhole, it popped in and out of existence too easily. I surmise that there are now a plethora of wormholes, sometime, somewhere, where before there had been few. Also, they were not large enough to do anything with in particular, other than conduct further research upon. And I suspect that they linked only to your world, or other simultaneously existing instances of your world. Pity.

The problem with this is that wormholes only work within the four dimensions of space and time. Wormholes will either bridged distances in 3 dimensions or connect alternate universes with your universe. You can break through the connecting walls of each alternate universe, but you cannot connect to a universe that is completely separate from your own. For those of you who are familiar with four dimensional geometic shapes: instead of connecting to another cube in a tesseract, I need to connect to a completely different tesseract and cross what could be considered a fifth dimension – this White Void, or Fourth Wall, or what have you. Wormholes can’t do that, so I’m still stuck here.

In my fury, I destroyed all my lab equipment, plans, and prototypes. The dinosaur helped. Then I ate it.

I had so much hope in this and FOUR DAYS WORTH of time and effort went down the tubes. So much for research. I need more ideas. The mirror idea is starting to look a little more tempting…

So, I did my research. There are no flying monkeys in this world, which means my original takeover plan is not a possibility. If I am to take my proper place as the prime terror in this world, I am going to have to find a different route towards rule. A less properly evil route, perhaps, but adaptations are sometimes necessary.

I saw an image of the current Wizard on a mechanical box yesterday, arguing with someone who wishes to replace him. Our Wizard may have been a cowering lout,  but he would have performed better than either of them did — neither of them even employed giant heads or bursts of flame. It was pathetic.

Maybe I could beat the rulers of this new world at their own game. I will look into this.

Okay, it’s quite clear that I’m not in Oz anymore. That’s lovely. Do you know what that means for me?

A whole new world to terrorize! Remember this post well, for it is the beginning of my new reign! Truly it was brilliant foresight on my part to decide to chronicle my progress.

Only, I seem to have run into a bit of a hitch. I told someone I needed to speak to your Wizard today, and he said he had no idea what I was talking about. He said: “We elect our leaders here.” You elect them?! That’s ridiculous. How can you people ever expect to get anything done?

A leader must rule through fear and flying monkeys, not through popular support. I will fix this when I rule.